I should invest in an global positioning satellite system. And tag everyone remotely associated with my office. Everyday I get asked questions - "Where is A? Is she coming to office today? Where is P? Where are the bosses? Are they coming to office? Where is...."
I cannot for the life of me fathom why I should know the answers to these endless queries. I tried telling folks politely that I don't have a GPS tracking device attached to my colleagues and bosses, neither can I read their minds, nor do they keep me informed of their whereabouts on a minute by minute basis.
But still people flock towards me. Even when the office is choc-a-block with people, these souls will unerring head towards me. And when I wear headphones to drown the incessant chatter, they will still come and ask me all these questions which I can't hear. So I'm forced to remove said headphones and go "What?". And of course, thick and fast come the standard queries that make me grind my teeth and bare them in a facsimile of a smile.
What to do? I put up a sign on the noticeboard next to me, "I am not my brother's keeper. I do not know where people are."
And still they flock-eth away. I need to move to the outer Mongolia...but I'm sure they will still find me.
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